Southern Comfort

Hi, my name is Karen, and I'm from the deep south.  Why, yes, my accent is as thick as my grandmother's pecan pie, but you can probably stop the trope-train there.

Yesterday morning, January 24, 2012, the area I grew up in was hammered by tornadoes.  My corner of Jefferson County, Alabama, was violated by the unforgiving and wanton winds of a tornado system.  Over 200 homes were destroyed, and at least two people died.  My best friend awoke on Monday to see a circle of destruction surround her home.  I have yet to watch any footage from the disaster.  Why?  Because I'm sick and tired of national coverage depicting southerners a particular way--especially those from Alabama.

From the coverage I have seen in my life, it would seem that Alabamians all live in trailer parks, are missing teeth, either wear moo-moos or overalls with no shirts, have rebel battle flags on their cars, and are completely ignorant as to the rules of grammar.  That kind of footage just adds insult to the injury already felt by the devastation of my home town, it's nigh on unbearable.  I'm not saying there's anything wrong with people who do fit that stereotype, I'm just tired of being stereotyped.

So, for the record:

• I do not live in a trailer park
• I did not drop out of high school.  In fact, I dropped out of graduate school.
• I still have all my teeth, except for my wisdom teeth.
• I wear normal clothes, especially if I'm going to be on camera.
• I don't hate black people, or gay people; nor do I exploit illegal aliens.
• I do not have a rebel battle flag sticker on the back of my car, on a t-shirt, or on a necklace.
• I did not get pregnant at fifteen.
• I own more than thirty pair of shoes, so I do not have to go barefoot.
• I do own a pick up truck, but it is only 6 years old, and it does not have rust spots on it
• The only thing I dislike about the north is their lack of biscuits and abundance of toast at breakfast restaurants.
• I do not drink sweet tea.
• My parents are not cousins.  

Did I cover everything?  I hope so.  Now, let's please put the silliness aside, and help those who are hurting.  Want to help?  Check out al.com's post on numerous ways to help--both locally and remotely.

“True heroism is remarkably sober, very undramatic. It is not the urge to surpass all others at whatever cost, but the urge to serve others at whatever cost.” --Arthur Ashe

Okay, tell me this doesn't sound awful:

"Playful Pals: Paralyzed Veterans of America Calendar"

Admittedly there is a puppy and a kitten on the cover, but still.  Just the sound of it.  And the cover picture doesn't seem that "playful."  More like the puppy himself is paralyzed in his back legs, and the kitten is taking advantage of it and nipping at his nose.  The rest of the pictures are either for the animals alone, simply coexisting (but not playing), or one nipping/smooshing/taking advantage of the other.  So, paralyzed veterans can coexist, sit and look lonely by themselves, or be picked on because of their inability to fight back.  It's a terrific calendar.  It's also last year's calendar.

This year's is all about humming birds--because when I think of paralyzed heroes, I think goofy little birds that can hover in place.  The title is--get this--"Hum Along."  So it makes me think the humming sound that those scooter chairs make.  Some of them probably use those scooter chairs--if they can afford them, that is.  The pictures themselves aren't that offensive, but completely incongruous.

Puppies, kitties, and humming birds all seem to be out of place in a calendar to support the paralyzed veterans.  If I were designing one, I would fill it with pictures of the paralyzed veterans serving others before they lost their mobility.  I don't want anyone to pity them, because they don't deserve pity.  I want people to remember the things they did to help us, so that now, when they need help, we don't miss the opportunity to return the favor.  "Patriotism" is very "in" right now.  I think you could make a bundle with these calendars if you just made them right.  It would help to support them, it would make their sacrifices known, and it would (above all) protect their dignity.  They're not "playful pals" or "humming along," they're wounded heroes.  They gave all to protect us, or in some cases rescue us from natural disasters.

Furthermore, I don't like cheap calendars about humming birds, puppies, and kitties.  My grandmother probably does, but let's face it, they're dying out.  Let's tap into the younger generations by appealing to their intelligence, and their heart.  And my grandmother would probably still buy the calendar if it showed pictures of the veterans before they got out of the military.  Can't you see it?  A picture of someone from the national guard helping a family during a flood; a picture of someone in the coast guard fishing someone out of the water; a picture of a guy in Iraq with his army buddies; a picture of a guard in the snow for Christmas.  Show these guys with all the dignity and honor they deserve, and then let them reap the benefits.

And yes, we will call it something like "Wounded Heroes," because they are still heroes, even if they can't walk anymore.  They earned the title.  You can't take it away just because their legs don't work.

“Don't feel entitled to anything you didn't sweat and struggle for.” --Marian Wright Edelman

So I have a problem at work.  Well, not necessarily a problem, but a frustration.  There is one employee who hinted yesterday that he would really like some jam or preserves to be provided for his toast in the morning, as we already have butter.  True, the company does provide basic condiments from time to time like butter, ketchup, mayo, and mustard, but beyond that, it's pretty much up to everyone else.  Well, he asked yesterday, and this morning, there was no jam, jelly, or preserves available for his toast.  Therefore, he griped about it under his breath while I was heating up my hot-pocket.

This is also the same person who gripes about running out of coffee and sugar, when he drinks at least a pot of coffee every day, while everyone else has one or two cups.  What he can't seem to understand is that the only thing the company is required to supply is good drinking water--which we do.  There is a water cooler with no fewer than four FULL bottles sitting next to it at all times.  All requirements have therefore been met.  If the company runs out of coffee, it is unfortunate, and will soon be rectified, but it is nothing to have a hissy fit over.  If we run out of sugar (as we do every week because someone is stealing 2.5 pounds of sugar at a time), it is again unfortunate, but nothing to raise a ruckus for days over.  And if the company does not provide you jam, then oh well.  That is not the company's obligation.

My frustration, I think, is his sense of entitlement.  Actually, I think it's the overall sense of entitlement around here.  Everyone here, who works for a construction materials testing lab, feels entitled to 8-5 hours.  The construction world doesn't work 8-5 so neither do we.  Each feels entitled to the cush jobs that require almost nothing of you, and then complain about how much they get paid when they get them.  Of course, on the flip side, every contractor feels entitled to have his job placed at top priority on the books, because we have "a contract with them."  They know very well that we have a contract with all of our clients, and that we have a "24 hour notice" stipulation in every contract.  If we are not notified 24 hours in advance, we are not obligated to supply them with a tech.  So technically, if they have a nine a.m. pour, and they call at four p.m. the day before, we are not contractually obligated to make that job.  But they're entitled to one an hour from now.

Then again, I come from an entitled generation.  I blame the parents, not video games.  Well, I also partly blame the internet for instant gratification, which leads to entitlement, but mostly I blame parents.  Your kid is not entitled to everything.  They are entitled to live free of abuse with plenty of food, and if you can't provide that for them, then they are entitled to get it from a caring foster parent.  Of course, I believe that you are not entitled to take them back, but must earn them back, but I'm not in charge.  Otherwise, your kids are not entitled to anything.  They are not entitled to go to the best school.  They are not entitled to go to college.  It's unfortunate but true.  By "entitling" kids to things they have no right claiming, we are robbing them of their natural talents and capabilities.  God did not create us with no purpose.  We all have one, but we also all have to work to fulfill them.

God also did not promise us comfort, so we are not entitled to a comfortable life.  Those who promise that you will have wealth if you just follow God are lying.  What God does promise, is to never leave you (Matthew 28:20).  He is always watching you (Psalm 33:18). And he does promise that HIS joy, not the world's joy, will come to you (Psalm 30:4-5).  THAT, beloved, is what God promises those who seek him.